My rice cakes have been debauched

I'm constantly and consistently looking for new keto food. Even an assortment of meat grows old. Found some Chocolate Caramel Protein Mini Rice Cakes on WM site. Had to be shipped, but that's just fine.

Normal people would look at the serving size: 16 little cakes, and be perfectly content to eat that and be done.

Not me.

They're good.

Really good.

I ate a four serving bag in two days.

Pretty sure I knocked myself out of ketosis.

And if THAT didn't do it...

These sons of bitches at Target did me in. 

Spent all day yesterday with middle child. Target. Sam's. Cheddar's (restaurant). 

Should have planned better.

Been craving something pumpkiny for a long minute.

I succumbed. 

Three bags of these. Not huge bags. Doesn't matter.

Serving size? 5, I think.

🤨

That's cute.

The devil's in the mini rice cakes. Little bit of sweet glaze on top, and I was cooked. 

Best thing for me to do is walk away. Instead...I walked toward. sigh

Even something as innocent as rice poofs thrown together can sidetrack you. 

It was a great detour, though.

Scattershot

Me. Today.

Can't quite pull my head out of my ass enough to start anything. Or rejoin in progress. I hate feeling twitchy. 

Do I have items to work on?

BAHAHAHAHAHA

Yeah. A few.

I am Chandler.

My "items" number in the 6-7 region on the numerical scale.

And yet...

*DEEP BREATH*

Fuck this. Someone or a few someones are being worked on today. 

1. The Rabbit God (probably not as I'm zipping back through The Gordons before I begin this one)

2. Polishing DD (maybe not--highly immersive--don't know if I have that in me)

3. Christmas short story (higher probability--left them after the first sex scene--we rejoin in progress)

4. Editing The Gordons (small likelihood--getting into some serious shit over there)

5. Dusting the Sanctuary (I crack myself up--hard pass)

6. Work on newsletter (maybe?)

7. Working on October goals (FFS...October?)

How's it going?

Oh. You know.

Left my glasses on the kitchen table after I ate breakfast and then wondered why they weren't where they were supposed to be in the living room.

Mentally screwed up my time for my LIVE hour for Inked in Words. I'm actually on at 3:00 PM CST.

FFS

Can't decide whether I want to: write on Christmas short story, continue polishing DD,  start on The Rabbit God, or let my ADHD have its way and do nothing until 3:00 PM.

Spinning my wheels in the mud. 

Not a fan.

Currently at my desk. Watching Murphy plot the deaths of all those on the other side of his window.

sigh

Occupational travel

The farthest away I'll drive is Ft. Smith. That's three hoursish. My body is in full rebellion, by that point. That really narrows down the book events I can attend and hawk my wares and brilliant personality. 

I'll be doing a virtual signing this Saturday at 4:00 pm CST in the group: The Well Read Women. It's a private group, so you would need to join before viewing the debacle known as my hour.

It's nice that I can stay in my office with a pillow in my back and chat about books and the wonder of words. Do I enjoy reader interactions?

SO SO much.

But I'm grateful for an outlet that gives me access to likeminded people.

Also, I've figured out that my authorly bucket list includes using all 100 ISBNs before I leave this realm. That's only like 50 more titles.

Piece of cake.

Two or three a year for the next twenty years.

So doable.

Give me my delusions.

But then catch me in 20 years.

We'll see who's laughing then, Leo.

🖕

Is it fall yet?

It most certainly isn't. The Sanctuary, my office, is hotter than the rest of the house. So, when it's near 100 outside, it's probably 85 in here, even though the house is set to 72. Makes for short days in front of the computer.

If I can only hold on until Monday...

WM pick up this morning. Sam's will be at 11. Because, um, that's when they let you order a rotisserie chicken with your pick up. I'm all about that life.

Other news?

Check out my Macaria proof.

OH. MY. FUCK.

So...I just go over to the 'zon and type in "Macaria", you know, like normal people. And guess what popped up?

Breast enhancer and vaginal tightening cream.

I am...fuck, I don't know what I am. 

Apparently I need to type in "Macaria book" FFS.

Note to myself and y'all. 

Antyway...as promised:

I love this cover. It seems impeccably right for her.

Check out LA Bennett's new best friend on the right side.

Have I already stated how much I love this damn series? How I am in love with the characters and their stories?

I always wondered how JD Robb remembered all the details in her "In Death" series. But really? When you create a place and its people, they're as real to you as someone sitting on your couch.

And I have MAJOR memory issues. The frustration is real, guys.

But I KNOW these characters. Their habits. Their jobs. Their personalities. 

And it's like coming home.

Lost Monday and Tuesday

Being in chronic pain is bullshit. 

Thanks for coming to my TED Talk.

Picked up my glasses Monday. Grabbed a pair of jeans from Cato's. Arrived home and didn't want to take another step.

Ye olde body was done.

By noon. On a fucking Monday.

Plans for my short story?

Blew up.

You can lead a mind and body to a book, but you can't make them fucking write it. 

Tuesday.

I never count because of Spravato.

Which leads me to today.

It's Wednesday, right?

argh

I feel like I haven't accomplished anything this week, and that weighs on me. Annoys me. Harshes my mellow.

Mid-week plans: write on my short story. 

That's about it.

Thank God I'm not performing brain surgery.

ISBNs and making records and publishing...OH MY!

Finished with the edits for "Macaria." Comfortable enough to pop in the preorder at the 'zon.  Once again, wish there were better outlets. 

ugh

But now comes the screen carousel.

Did I tell y'all I bought 100 ISBNs? I so badly wish they were physical, and I could roll around in them.

Too much?

heh

Antyway, I'm adding "Macaria" as a preorder. Will have to tie her to an ISBN first. Then play over at the 'zon by adding her as a new ebook and paperback. The paperback, of course, will be a draft. The ebook will be a preorder.

One of the first times I added a title with an ISBN, I wasn't exactly sure what the fuck I was doing. Did it stop me? Of course it didn't. 

All I could do was mess up. *shrug*

But, it's fairly intuitive. I muddled through and have since become more comfortable with the process.

But onto another cluster of mine.

So, my friends, I wrote the first five books of this series about six weeks each. I was flying. And I was going to make "The Gordons" the fourth book, but then I had the idea to actually make "Macaria" the fourth book and "The Gordons" the fifth.

Which is great, for others, because I still have "Macaria" saved as "The Gordons" in my documents. Then "Mac and Medi" is actually "The Gordons."

Have I changed this cluster?

I certainly have not.

Because, wait for it, I will screw myself up and add shit where it does NOT need to be added. I'm scared to mess with the system, y'all. 

My weird system.

My "I'm uploading 'The Gordons' for 'Macaria' today because if I do something different, we're all going to get an unpleasant surprise" system.

Who cares about the critical names of documents, anyway?

FFS

Off to create another book in the eyes of the Library of Congress. Add that heifer to the 'zon. Absolutely twig when I go to create "The Gordons", and I've forgotten what I've already done.

FFS

Home for the foreseeable future

I, hopefully, have nowhere to go until next Tuesday. 

You know what my favorite is? Typing shit like that and then realizing I have to go back to the stupid mall to ask questions about my stupid glasses bill and pick up my stupid glasses.

FFS

Editing "Macaria," and I realize that this book is the first one I forsook chapter breaks in lieu of writing down the story. I wrote five books in six months in this series. Adding them now. 

Wondering how I'll treat "The Rabbit God." Will be interesting.

Overcast here. Thank the heavens!!! Back-building some rain in, and I'm excited. Good day to write. And this is me...wanting two things at once.

Edit Macaria.

Write on The Rabbit God.

This is why I'm convinced I assimilated my twin in the womb. We both have strong opinions.

Next week is work on my Christmas short story for a Christmas anthology. 

It's funny. You think you have all the time in the world, but the world knows better.
Plan if you can.

Straight up hilarious coming from me.

Most times, mine blow up in the absolute most horrible ways.

And yet, I endeavor.

Inked in Words Virtual Signing next Saturday. I believe my hour starts at 5:00 pm.

I'll be chatting for an hour or so about writing and my books. Feel free to pop in with questions or anything on your mind.

I really want this bat outfit...

Labor Day

It's funny. I work for other places, I have Labor Day off. I work for myself. Here I am in front of the computer about to tear it up.

The irony.

I did take yesterday off. It was surreal but nice. I think I need to designate Sunday as a rest day. Except, if I get a really good idea. Or one of several other things.

Then, all bets are off.

I only have one appt this week. Have to take Mom to her long-distance standing med appt. Like 6 hours of the day. So Tuesday (never count this day) and Wednesday are booked. 

Remember how I bought that nifty pretty weekly planner thing to write down when I should post on socials?

Yeah. That went south quickly. 😬

I'm now using its magnificentness to write down what I need to do for the week.

This week is: Edit Macaria, write The Rabbit God, and polish another book.

Because my neurodivergent brain must have options. The only one I don't feel like doing is writing "The Rabbit God." This is a problem for two reasons.

1. I need to write the damn thing.

2. I want to write the book after that one in the series.

Here's the dealio...I want to write the book. I have it in my head, chilling. With all the other cool ideas. But the book after that is comedic as fuck, and you know I like to wallow in that shit. Because LA Bennett is taken by surprise. 

As in, all the other surprises, up until now, she could swallow. This one...not so much. Nor does she want to.

Man, I love her.

I switched "Macaria" and "The Gordons" after I finished both. But sequentially, I need to stick with Rabbit God first. 

I respect the process.

I will, however, flip it off, tell it to go to hell, and threaten it with all my literary homicidal tendencies. 

But, I respect it.

Also, stitches update.

Got damn annoying.

Went back Wednesday (10 days) after knife fight. PA Wong removed one of the four stitches and immediately stopped because my skin was pulling apart.

So he slaps a steri-strip on it and tells me to come back Sunday (14 days) after knife fight.

Well, when Crystal only has one place to go that isn't a big deal, Crystal does not bother getting dressed. 

Now, I need to find time to throw on some clothes to wait for an hour for someone to remove three stitches.

At this point in time, I'm just going to adopt them. 

Cue the trio of cute names together:

Marsha, Jan, and Cindy

Tic, Tac, and Toe

Harry, Ron, and Hermione

Blossom, Bubbles, and Buttercup

Kirk, Spock, and McCoy

Luke, Leia, and Han Solo

Don't even get me started on snipping them, myself.

Molly is absolutely appalled but not surprised.

Welcome to my marriage.

Back to the salt mines

I do best when I start immediately working after breakfast. Like, let my food settle and then get on it. I am less ambitious when I have to do things after breakfast but before writing.

We had to run to the bank this morning.

Necessary but extremely tedious.

I am not feeling much of anything right now, much less the will to write.

But, I will.

I need to for a few reasons:

1. It saves my sanity while robbing me of it. (It's an interesting dynamic.)

2. I have deadlines I actually wrote down.

3. I need to add more things to my Book Funnel page to make it aesthetically pleasing. (Someone shoot me.)

4. All I have is the back three pages or so to edit for a book. Why am I blogging, then? 

Blogging is writing foreplay. I'm trying to get into the mood. 

Fun news?

I have all the stuff for my swag bags now so I can build them tomorrow.

About, um, two-hundred, I think.

But that's an item on my to-do list for another day.

I think I have quite enough to tackle today.🤨

In related news...

 ...yesterday damn near killed me.

I count Wednesday as a work day. The only day I don't count is Tuesday because of Spravato. No worries. I usually work at least half a day Sunday and most of Saturday. This is my fix.

Antyway...did a WM pick up at seven in the morning. Because I made an appt at 8:15 for Urgent Care and removal of stitches. Then...eleven o'clock was eye appt and new glasses.

sigh

WM pick up went swimmingly. Rushed home. Put stuff up. By that time, I needed to change and go to Urgent Care. It's a mile away.

Lo and behold, when I arrived in a timely manner, I was told I could indeed, NOT, get my stitches taken out there. Some new policy within the last couple of months. So I took my annoyed self in some Thai lounge pants and Salem, Massachusetts "witch" shirt back to Mercy ER.

Front chick checked me in. 

Then another chickie took me back to weigh me.

Now...let's be clear. I weigh myself every Wednesday. It's my routine, at this point. I look at the woman, tell her I weighed myself that morning and gave her the number.

This heifer looks at me. The scale. Back at me. 

My reply? "No."

That shit will make the sun shine out of your ass. 

She was pissed I broke protocol. I thought it bad form to break out in dance, but I wanted to.

She huffs and takes my blood pressure.

Back out to the waiting room.

Keep in mind, I'm in the ER for the removal of four stitches. They didn't weigh my short ass coming in, so I thought it was extra stupid. You know...above and beyond regular stupid.

Finally land my ass on a hospital bed in the hallway. 

PA Wong comes over and checks out his handiwork. I ask him if he's about to undo it. He says he'll grab his stuff and be right back. 

Cool beans.

The man comes back, snips one stitch, and the skin tries to pull away. BECAUSE OF COURSE IT DOES.

I knew my body wasn't ready for stitch removal, cue the soreness and pain, but I believed 10 days was enough time blah blah blah.

It was not.

Sir put a steri-strip across where the first stitch was and advised me to come back on Sunday (two weeks since my idiotic move.)

Fine.

Then, as an afterthought, PA Wong tells the nurse to get me a thumb splint.

Here's where it gets dicey. 

I assumed...why why why???...this would be something small that wrapped around my stitches and kept my thumb immobile. 

It was indeed, not.

I'm salty as the ocean by this time. 

Seriously? This monstrosity? For my fucking thumb?

First of all, I feel like this is overkill.

Do I want my thumb to peel open like an overripe banana?

Absolutely not.

But, FFS. 

Second of all, this bastard hurts the massive bruise I have on said injured hand.

But do I wear the bitch? Yeah.

I ask the nurse whether I need to shower with it.

She says no. And I don't need to wear it to bed.

Pardon my finest fuck, then why am I wearing it?

I'm supposed to keep my thumb up, and I've been doing that.

The only time I'm probably not is when I sleep.

So I listened to Dr. Inman, myself, and wear it at night now. 

I'm typing right now with no issue, thus far, and my steri-strip is calling my thumb "home" so there hasn't been a huge necessity to put on the beastie. And it's HOT. My poor thumb is in a sauna.

Later, I get ready for my eye appt at 11. It's in one of the malls. Great. I get a map. I find my spot. I park. 

I'm protesting, loudly, at the shit fucking day I've had whilst I glare at my left hand. Yank open the first JC Penney door, it was the closest to the eye place, and then reach for the second. There's a young man behind me who probably heard my diatribe.

This soul looks at me and says, "JC Penney doesn't open until 11."

BECAUSE OF COURSE THEY FUCKING DON'T.

I sigh, turn around, eyeball where my car is parked and think it can't possibly be that far to the next entrance.

Have I stated previously that my impulsiveness is probably an issue?

Yeah.

Found the next exit. Finished my business.

Then hiked half a mile back to my fucking car. In the heat. With this stupid hand binder on.

By this time, I have a lovely headache at the base of my neck, I'm sweating like I think it's a fun thing to do, and I'm cranky as shit.

I am peopled out, there were like ELEVEN of them, salty as Morton's, and could not give a fuck less about anything. 

My body hates me, I'm brain dead, and Murphy has started drafting "Missing" flyers for me.

Today, my darlings, looks to be a bit better.

One hopes.

I have so much to do as far as work, and I'm having the executive dysfunction hilarity, and I need to just do it.

Nike...don't sue me.

It's the last thing I need.

Organization...bahaha

I strive to be organized. Like...STRIVE. This is the first year I've used a planner for every month. And wrote shit down. At fifty-four. 

I know some of it is ADHD. It's actually in the description. Because I have the best of intentions, but I forget. A lot. Like it's a hereditary trait my DNA must hold onto, or I will wither up and die.

I have a PA now. Love her. She helps, thank goodness. She has a sheet with goals for every month and whatnot. Forced me to jot down the wants and needs of my business in black and white. Did I do it for the next eight months?

Of course I did.

It's feast or famine with me.

Sent out a test newsletter a couple days ago. 

Told you about my shitshow with Email Octopus.

But when I went to upload my actual newsletter, it took me five minutes.

I need everyone to breathe deeply with me and say a couple of "ohms" because fuck.

Now. I think I was supposed to let my PA do all of that.

I think I needed to only find the platform, and I don't fucking know what.

🤷

Then give her snips and snaps I wanted in there.

I mocked the whole thing up in Canva, loved it, and uploaded it.😬

I'm a basic bitch with this stuff. It's clean and easy-to-read. Nothing dazzling or glittery. I'd rather save my time for writing. But even having a PA is confusing. She does my reels, ARC management, and newsletter management. 

Unfortunately, my PA dictionary is missing.

What does this MEAN?

I used to be a control freak. Now...I'm a little better. But I want my imprint all over everything. I want my readers to know it's me, and I put the effort in.

Is anything ever easy with me?

Stay tuned for an upcoming blog, "I think the fuck not."

Email Octopus

Ah. My newsletter "platform" which I've been on for the past three fucking hours trying to send a simple test newsletter.

I am cranky as hell and completely over it.

Next time, the heavens help me, I hope to reduce that time by half. 

Needed to take some anxiety pills as I'm teetering on the rails over here. 

Some of it may be the ADHD. But that site is NOT intuitive. NONE OF IT.

And I'm struggling to find air as I'm clicking all the POS words on the side and trying to find something to help.

Tried Google. Tried the site's source of info and help.

None for me.

Finally fucked around and found out. But Christ on a fruit newton, I'm exhausted.

Makes me want to hop off the keto train and self-soothe with ice-cream, or cupcakes, or a tasty cheeseburger WITH the bun.

sigh

Sometimes this life is a bit rough. 

Woe to the two other tasks I specifically needed to do today.

Kuzko and I are in mourning.😭

Bottomless tool box

I'm like a little sponge. I follow several writer groups on FB. I read articles almost daily. I want to KNOW all about the book business. What works. What doesn't. What do readers like/want/hate?

My newest addition to my writer tool box is listening to some guy read my manuscript back to me. It's slow as shit. Around 25 pages an hour. But it's also thorough. I can't listen to audiobooks because they're: 1. too slow 2. I got distracted and almost ran into ditch

So listening to this male is a little bit like death at first, but he grows on you. I follow along visually since that's my type of learning.

If you're not sure of yours, look it up. This knowledge is invaluable.

I don't remember verbal instructions. Don't give a damn if there's only three. They'll be lost in the shuffle of my grey matter.

ahem

Threw together a newsletter.

Okay. Labored over what to put, how to put it, where to put, etc. Because I will overthink a blade of grass, given the opportunity.

Hoping that goes over well. Quite a few readers entrusted me with their email and WANT to hear about my wonderful world of make-believe.

Bless them all.

I'm also contemplating adding book art? fan art? whatever the fuck it's called art to my books. I actually have an artist I can use, and I want them all to be a certain style. 

Am I juggling too many plates?

Is there ever a time when I'm not?

Guys! I have a PA, and I'm still plowing through all these new things. It's exciting and daunting and makes my wee mind explode, in a mostly good way.

Next up, book boxes and maybe kickstarters...to be continued.

Over the weekend, I got in a knife fight.

With myself. We both won. I cut the fuckforsaken industrial strength zip tie, and I went to the ER for four stitches in my left hand.

Should have opened the POS item with scissors and not my pocket knife. I called it a pocket knife until my wife posted this on FB:

Hers is on the left. Mine is on the right. With my O- still on there.😶

Because...I don't play.

Today has been getting over my Spravato lag. It's been getting worse every Wednesday. Exhausted would be putting it mildly. But the stuff works, so every Tuesday it is.

Going to fine tune "Dream Walker" again. 

You really can edit your book all the time and STILL find something to improve.

Daunting, I know.

Finished editing "Ace" and set it up for my preorder. Had my PA send out the ARC forms. 

September looks to slow down with appts (August has been ridiculous), but it's full of birthdays. 🥳🎉

And also, healing from my knife fight. 🗡

Busy

It's so cute because the Honey describes my busy time as summer. The most book events and whatnot. But if you know me and the birthdays of my family, you would see that September-December kicks my ass every year.

We have three granddaughters and the Honey's bday in September.

All the kids (adults) in October. Wedding anniversary.

Thanksgiving with the whole crew.

Christmas.

Then, I take the deepest of breaths and begin again.

Oh. Did I mention I'll release two more of the Plot Twist series books and a short story in an anthology? Plus, editing three books. 

Writing helps keep the depression away. Does absolutely nothing for my anxiety, though. 🤔😂

Had the yearly boob squish today. Hated it. 

I'd like to know exactly when someone thought it was a good idea to compress my boob, and THEN turn the fucking knob three times to make sure she doesn't escape. 🤨

Yeah. That boob isn't going anywhere. I fear for my nipple, at this point, though.

And still, I say go have their pictures taken. Better safe than any other option.

MEN and WOMEN.

Okay. Off to clean the hacienda a bit. Having a granddaughter bday party tomorrow, and she's spending the night. 🥰

If I haven't birthed you or occupied the same room while you were birthed, do not expect such niceties.

Wear shoes, and don't lay on the floor. 😆

Book Events--not all about the immediate sales

Let's be honest. We want an agent to contact US about representation, and we want to sell ALL THE BOOKS at book events. 

Because=human.

But let's take a look at what a book event can do:

1. I gave out every one of my business cards I had. Probably around 150 at the last event.

2. Sales at the event.

3. At the previous event, there were six book orders placed within that week.

4. After this last event, my traffic, on site, went up 3%. While that may not sound like much, it's a literal ton compared to daily activity.

5. Putting your name out there. Being visible to readers.

6. Letting readers have a face to a name.

Some tables at these events are a bit costly. Authors need to weigh several variables before they blow $200-$500 on a one-day event.

Number of tickets sold.

Expected crowd number.

Type of book event.

Author recommendations. (This is huge.) Word of mouth works everywhere.

Repeat attendee for said event.

There are a lot more events popping up in smaller cities which are imperative to study. If you can get in on the inaugural event, you can have that foothold to create relationships and build strong author to author and author to reader bonds.

Love the familiar faces on both sides.

Travel.

The farthest I travel now is Ft. Smith. I can do about three hours in a car. Then I need to be horizontal with a pharmacy of pills within my reach. 

I love doing shows in Oklahoma. 

Local people are incredibly supportive.

All in all, if you've a book or two out, you may want to consider investing in a book event. It'll invest in you.

BEHOLD!

 Guys! GUYS!

Okay, we all know I'm an office toy addict. Love me some post-it notes, multi-color pens, and other hyphenated good things.

But, you guys, I ordered myself...an embosser.

She is beautiful. 🥲

Came in yesterday but didn't see it until today. Broke that bad girl out and immediately fucked up the nearest paper to me.

It reads:

From the library of (on top)

Inman Books (bottom)

And my fucking logo in the middle!!!

This little piece of metal brought a tear to my eye. 

Another step. Another milestone. Another office toy.

I always wanted to be a library when I grew up. 💖

Man. Next Tuesday has big shoes to fill.

Sunday? Monday?

Let's do the time warp again.

It's Sunday, but I got home after eight last night after my three-hour drive and was catatonic. Body today is being a right bitch.

All worth it.

Every single ache, pain, and spasm.

Book Me Romance is always special to me. I love the other authors and cherish all the readers. They are the sweetest souls. I have a new bracelet from a fantastic reader. I have stickers and business cards from other authors. 

I sold more than a few books.

It was simply the best time.

(If you want to attend 2027, please get your tickets early. Ashley always sells out.)

We had 423 people this year. Ashley is going for 600 next year.

I sold out two titles. Gave away all my gold bags and business cards. 

I'm already building a cart in Vista Print.

A last minute add-on brought people to my table. So doubling that order.

And while it was a romance book event, I always bring different things. My two most popular titles were "Canary" and "Apollo and Hyacinthus". 

Quite a few readers were into mythology and found the premise fresh. Also, everyone loved my covers. That I made. That are not AI. 

And one reader in the group specifically asked if there were any queer authors or queer characters.

I was the only one who responded, and her group buzzed by my table. 

It was awesome.

All in all, I can't wait for next year. I've already signed up, of course. 

The only difference from now on, is I think I will only take 10 titles instead of 13. 

🤭

MODERATION

Preorders and newsletters

Here I go again...testing my own boundaries.

I would say I'm "old school", but I'm that and simply old.

What I love about the written word is that it's not only a young person's game. Writers can jump in at any point in time and give it a go.

Or...keep going.

I've had 3 preorders. 

These are a massive gift to the unsure. 

What?

You want my book?

Sight unseen???

Do you need a kidney? Cornea? Name it.

The amount of excitement I feel when getting a preorder is truly unholy. 

There's a small dance and hip wiggle.

Because EXCITEMENT!

And I ride that dopamine high the entire day.

And for things I fucked up the first time but now will have help with...AKA...someone else in charge--is newsletters.

I had the best intentions.

And I tried, people.

I tried.

But I quite sucked.

And that's fine.

Recognition is the first step. Stepping away is the second. I've laid the groundwork for my PA to pop in and throw those bad boys together.

Gathering sigs now for the list.

And that's another thing.

You're giving me your email? To learn more about me and my books?

Is this...is this heaven?

I'm constantly surprised and delighted by reader response. 

I live for it.

It is the one constant that keeps me going. 

Would I still write? I would.

But readers make my world go 'round.

Excited for this Saturday and Book Me Romance. 

Dopamine...sweet dopamine.

Do you remember the time?

Nope. Sure be cool if I did.

As I've progressed normally through time...I've AGED...I have aged. My body, once able to sling a hydraulic arm wherever I wanted it, has problems opening the mayo jar. My short-term memory is absolute shit. I won't be giving any embarrassing details. Um, let's just say I can put a microwave plate in for forty-five seconds, look down where it was, and wonder if I actually got one out.

I make lists now. And I mean even for basic shit. Need to clean Murphy's water fountain? List. Drugs at WM? List. Gas in the car? List. 

These are the foundation to keep parts of my life together. 

When I remember to make them...

The only thing I don't make lists for is usually my writing. If it's an editing day, great. Writing? Great. Making covers and talking shit to myself? Splendid.

However, anything related to writing gets the "list" treatment.

Make up sparkle bags today. List. Make up pre-order bags. List. Print and laminate a couple of papers. List.

I've started taking a cheat sheet, elevator pitches, with me when I attend a book event. Because, given the chance, I'll tell you how the evil scorpion guy in "Canary" glows and why. 

But ask me what I had for dinner yesterday...

On that same keto note, we went out to Bubba's 33 Sunday.

It was phenomenal. First time in. I would usually grab a double burger or chicken fried steak/chicken. Because yes, please.

This time? I searched over the menu beforehand and picked the "California chicken." 

Let me show the prettiness.

Dear lordt. It was so good I bought another entree of the same to bring home to eat later.

And weigh-in?

HA! Didn't gain anything. Lost a couple pounds. 

The reason I quit keto the first time was lack of variety. And while I get in food ruts, thanks ADHD, when I shift...it's the whole she-bang.

Now, I try to find foods that will fit in my keto budget. I didn't get the garden rice beneath the chicken breast. Ate steamed broccoli.

Now, if only my body would get the memo.

Making up the gold bags today after a WM drug run and Sam's. 

See?

They're on my list.

Gearing up for Book Me Romance 2026

I needed rubber bands the other day. Okay, one rubber band. My middle child child's fan had two stripped screws, tiny bastards, that refused to budge. Read online I could put a rubber band over it, and then use a screwdriver to loosen. I couldn't find my BAG of rubber bands. I thought I had some on my desk. I did not. Then, thought maybe in my Sanctuary closet.

The Sanctuary closet is special, as in it holds everything I don't have another place for. Plus, all my books are in there.

Have a rolling book cart from my last job, with two top rows and two bottom, split in the middle. That's on the left. Then, shelves on the right. High shelves I need a stepladder to reach.

I brailed all the usual places. No such luck.

And I, in my ADHD madness at this point, decided fuck it I'm cleaning out the Sanctuary closet.

I will remind all how short-sighted I sometimes am. 

Yeah. Probably take me two or three hours.

Or, not so much. 

Three days later, and now all I need to do is dust and vacuum. No, um, specific timeframe for that. 

heh

That leads me to the absolute wonderness of a clean closet, all my books in clear totes, a new fucking wagon to put all my shit in at conferences and events, and a sense of accomplishment that will last three or four days, max.

Broke down enough Amazon boxes I'm almost ashamed.

I usually take sparkly bags with me to events with my business card, stickers, and an old-school library book due date slip.

I think I finally gave away all 500 of them. The last at Red Dirt Romance Book Event.

I toyed with not having these little gems but decided to do so, anyway.

Gold bags coming in tomorrow.

Bought over 100 of those 24K gold eye mask things you put under your eyes. New stickers. 

I'll be throwing those together Tuesday or Wednesday.

Hard to believe I'll be driving to Ft. Smith this Friday afternoon.

I don't think the cord between Murphy and me stretches that far.

First night we've been apart.

And he still is insecure about some stuff.

Send me good thoughts! And some to Murphy!

Accidentversary

 July 31, 2017, I was driving home from work on I-44. Not my usual route, but I-40 was packed. Came up on May Ave and glanced in my rearview mirror. I saw the orange hood of a pickup that seemed too fucking close.

It was.

Hit me and crushed in the back of my first new vehicle. I don't remember the crash. Fuck knows I've tried because I hate not knowing. I remember the firefighters leaning me back in the driver's seat because they had to cut me out the back. Putting some cloth over my face to protect it. 

Then there was an ambulance ride with Mo. 

Tried to put a collar on me, but I told him I was claustrophobic.

Then I'm going through a CAT scan.

That's how I remember.

Flash segments. From one to the next to the next.

There was an off-duty EMT guy who apparently came on the scene first. Took his spare t-shirts to put behind my bleeding head. And I guess I told him how to unlock my phone so he could call the Honey. All of which happened, and I don't remember a lick of it.

I was in shock. 

Bad concussion.

Did a number on my body. 

So on and so forth.

This year, I was going to let the day slide. I'm acutely aware of it. But 9 years later?

I still think about it. 

And I'm glad I'm still here to spread love and snark. 

Damn Keto, anyway

The only way I lose ANY weight is keto. I've literally tried everything. Tae-Bo. Denise Austin. Limited calories. Limited sugar. Limited fat. Numerous mish-mash of diet and exercise. Ad nauseum.

Keto works. 

Fine. 

Adjusted my diet. Eating strict keto foods. On the bandwagon. Except...I can't have ice-cream. Buttered pecan ice-cream. The ice-cream of my soul. 

I thought...hey! Let's grab some fruit and try to make up for missing some of that sugar ice-creamy goodness. 

Green grapes.

Oh. My. Fuck.

I love those little bastards. 

The ones with tight surface tension? Almost crispy?

*makes embarrassing noise*

Those.

Except...when I weighed myself this week, I GAINED half a pound.

What the fuck? Gained???

I was...let's say willfully ignorant. Because I didn't check to see if these were on the good or naughty list. I didn't want to know.

Well. Now I know.

How dare those sweet little motherfuckers knock me out of ketosis?

How dare I gain a damn pound when I'm going without ice-cream. Buttered pecan, for those keeping track.

I mean...sure. I could cut back, maybe.

Instead of eating, say, five pounds in three days.

Having them for breakfast and lunch yesterday.

You know, be...moderate.

*laughs so hard I pulled something*

Alas, that is not me. Will never be me.

And so, sigh, I'm giving up the green round crispy goodness so I can fit into a cute new pair of white jeans I bought.

It's the fucking audacity.

I guess I'll live. 

Hit the ground...walking

Stumbled into the Sanctuary about five minutes ago. Have the "I've Got a Dream" song from Rapunzel in my head. Because of course I do. Sometimes, if I'm paying attention (hardly ever), my song loop pertains to my moment.

Tuesdays are rough for me. Have an intensive therapy that leaves me exhausted and not functioning as normal.

In bed on and off since one yesterday afternoon. Still not enough sleep to fit in a thimble. 

No rest for the wicked.

Book 7 of the Plot Twist series came to me. Dialogue, plot, and all the goodness. Except, I didn't have the werewithal to jot anything down. Relying on my memory right now.

Going to open OneNote and start a notebook for it. 

Still editing Ace. I love the story. Absolutely love it. And he's such a good foil for LA.

Readers bought books 1 and 2 of my Plot Twist series last Saturday. It was "The Morrigan"s actual release day. A reader asked me how long I expected the series to be. At least a dozen, was my answer. And likely, more than that. It IS hard because it's not a stand-alone. It's an arc. You've got to meet LA in the beginning to appreciate the character and her snail-like growth.

Still sitting in this chair like a shrimp. Still roasting my ass off in his fucking state. But, it's back to work as long as I can sit in this chair.

 

Mixed bag

I love book events. Well, my heart and soul do. My body hates them with a passion. My chronically in pain short ass loathes those damn chairs. My back and hips pay the price for the next five days or so. My body has a hangover that lasts nearly a week. I'm not sure how much longer I can do these events. I've already booked half a dozen of them for next year. We'll see how that goes. Toting everything around does a number on me. 

I need a little chart I can put on the front of my table.

Has:

Anxiety

Chronic pain

Fibro

ADHD

Proceed with caution.

I feel bad because the expectation from readers is usually the author stands as they come by. Sometimes, I simply can't. Or I'll stand and lean against the top of my pushed-in chair. But, being mostly deaf in my left ear doesn't help communication, either.

ON THE BRIGHT SIDE!

Have I mentioned I love readers? Like LOVE THEM??? There is nothing like engaging like-minded people, laughing, and having a wonderful conversation with them. I appreciate each and every person who stops by to say hi, grab a book, or simply make conversation.

You are my people! 🩷

Spent yesterday practically catatonic in my rocker recliner. Back and hips still pissed today. 

But, right now I'm sitting like a shrimp at my desk and eyeballing all the things I need to do.

Don't blame me...blame the chucklefuck fairy

I had a full day by 10:30 this morning.

Went to the wrong event.

Got lost in the parking garage--both walking and driving.

Nearly went ass-to-water as the toilet seat in the public bathroom was up because it was freshly cleaned.

Choked on the juice of a single grape.

Almost had to use my alarm to find my car in the WM parking lot. So much for parking close to the cart corral.

I'm home now for both your and my safety.

Taking 13 titles tomorrow because The Morrigan arrived yesterday!

Tomorrow is her release day, and I'm so excited. 

Already listed Ace as a preorder for eBooks. That's Plot Twist book 3 for those keeping track.

And another thing, what in the fuck-all is Netflix doing with "life style" shows? I want serial killers, cranky Scottish detectives, and ruthlessly aggressive thrillers.

Went through the "new" shows, and I was not remotely impressed.

Please stop.

Red Dirt Romance Eve

Spent the morning sorting and stacking my titles. Ordered "The Morrigan" in time to take Saturday for the book sale, but Amazon is going to Amazon. May or may not receive them tomorrow. Should have been here Wednesday.

Made four bundles of my "Canary" series. Pried Murphy's jaws off my books, post-it notes, and totes. He was in rare form. Currently passed out.

Readying myself for these is like going on vacation. I try to get everything I can done previously so I don't have to deal with it when I come back. Because I will be tossed.

Also, give it a week, and I'm off for Ft. Smith, Arkansas, August 15th. Doing all the hard work today. But Executive Dysfunction is coming through with bells. I didn't want to start. 

Not like there was a choice. 

As I grew more and more irritated with myself. 

Finally, literally, threw up my hands and did what I needed. 

It's hard to fight your brain, you know. 

Oh! Received a preorder for Book Me Romance so that is uber exciting. I've only had a few, and a lot of attendees say they prefer to see the books in person unless it's like an auto-buy.

For Saturday, I'll be using my display rack for the first time. 

I. Am. So. Fucking. Excited!

Should I be editing Ace? Starting on The Rabbit God? Editing through Warrior and the Sparrow? 

Indubitably. 

Am I?

What the opposite of indubitably?

Ooooo...actually dubitably. 

I have never used that word in my entire life. 

Probably won't start now.

But my ADHD is ADHDing today, also.

Always a party in the Sanctuary.