A lot has been made of first impressions.
We "first impression" so many things daily. People. Places. Food. Clothes. Cars.
Right after the impression comes judgment. Kind or unkind. Usually unkind.
"Did she even brush her hair today?"
"They should have used better lighting in here."
"Did you SEE what they served her? I can't believe someone would actually order that."
"He's one step up from a hobo in those clothes."
"Look how far his tag is out of date!"
I'm imperfectly made and find myself responding like my opinion makes one whit of difference. But I'm getting better. I try to step back and give the moment space. It's so easy to be wrapped up in your own head garbage when you don't need to be.
I step back and push me out of the way. I strive to be objective. Objectivity opens your eyes a lot further than subjectivity.
I don't know what kind of day people have had to judge anything about their hygiene or appearance. I don't know if they can afford what they need in that area.
It's completely none of my business what others choose to eat. I don't like calf fries, but kudos if you do. You may not like mashed potatoes. More for me. This is personal preference, not an affront to your taste buds. Grow up. We're not in first grade, anymore.
This is not an easy world to live in. Prices are jumping up daily from bread to toilet paper to insurance. Luxury items are a joke. I had three shirts I rotated, in junior high, growing up. Believe me, I never needed a reminder. I knew how few clothes I had and when I wore the same shirt two days that week.
And car tags? Yes. They're obviously a priority. And they're obviously expensive. Used to be a bit of a game when I would catch the earliest car tag date. Now? I wish I had the money to give them to update their tag.
First impressions can be both brutal and devastating because your eyes and brain have already taken in details you haven't even consciously noticed before you open your mouth.
I'm simply asking for a space. An inhalation and exhalation to clear your mind of preconceived notions before you communicate.
People are uniquely made and infinitely quirky. Give yourself a chance to know them beyond the stereotypical exterior. Maybe you do, and they ARE exactly what they portray. That's fine, too. But allow them that one space to be anything.
Sometimes our actions pin them into a box as sure as their inaction.
I think the world is opening up more. People are realizing they can express themselves with body art, piercings, and clothing choices. It's incredibly important to be able to be who you're meant to be. And there are more people accepting of these modifications.
Please.
Take that space.
Always writing*
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